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Just Ask Alice

DEAR ALICE: A friend invited me to visit a nudist camp with him. I said okay, but I'm not quite sure what to expect. Any ideas?

—UNDERDRESSED

IN OVERTON

DEAR UNDER: Expect to be shocked. Most people look far better with their clothes ON.

—ALICE

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DEAR ALICE: What is the most valuable possession you have?

—CURIOUS IN CORNING

DEAR CUR: It's the most valuable thing that we all have and something that most people think nothing about wasting, (until they get to be my age): TIME.

— ALICE

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DEAR ALICE: Is it true that former President Bill Clinton became uncontrollably nervous just before his recent heart surgery?

—WONDERING

IN WYSOX

**********

DEAR WO: My sources tell me it is true. When Clinton heard rumors that Monica Lewinsky would be performing the surgery, he became a little edgy. Word has it that it was Hillary Clinton who started the rumor.

—ALICE

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DEAR ALICE: I heard someone saying the other day that they had cheated death. What did they mean by that?

—TOWANDA TEEN

DEAR TO: They meant that instead of knocking on death's door, they rang the doorbell and ran away. Death just hates that.

—ALICE

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DEAR ALICE: My dad has been trying to get me to believe that when President Bush visited Lackawanna Stadium last week, the concession stands sold beer. Is this true?

—THIS BUD'S FOR YOU, GEORGE!

—TOWANDA

DEAR THIS: your dad is only half-right. They sold only BUSH beer.

—ALICE









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